The In Vitro Journey - The Longest Overdue Update of All Time(Sorry!)

I am officially the worst blogger ever. I left you all hanging with no answers after our embryo transfer and 2 week wait. I'd like to think I have a pretty good excuse but in all reality I've just been lazy. Alas, I promise to give you the whole update and not skimp out on any details.

My last update ended at 4 days past our embryo transfer. Well 2 days later at 6dpt (days past transfer) we got this result:

See that super faint, almost invisible line? Well so did we. That was the start of some very happy news. I then continued to take at home pregnancy tests daily and we watched the line get darker and darker.

Our first blood test at the fertility doctor was on 10dpt. The doctors consider anything over 50 to be a positive pregnancy test.. Ours was WAY above 50:

The doctors were very happy with this number and considered us totally pregnant. They even said with a number that high they expect there could be multiples! We were pretty confident there were two babies in there as well. We had our second beta test on 12dpt. A normal result would be around 1,500-2,500. Ours, again, was WAY above that:

We were over the moon! We both cried and decided we were in the clear to start telling our friends and family. Since people were already so involved in our IVF process there wasn't much room for surprises. My parents were asking about the blood test results before I even had the blood drawn. Luckily, I was able to hide it from my two best friends and revealed it to them like this:

So all was well, everyone was happy and excited and we started to really celebrate our IVF success. We've come so far! We deserve this and we are so happy to see the fruits of our labor paying off. Then came the scariest moment of our lives when I began bleeding. We're not talking a little bit of blood that could be considered spotting; we're talking a LOT of blood with blood clots and abdominal cramps. We expected the worst. The doctors put me on bed rest until they could see me the next day. I was seen at 5w3d and they told me it was too early to see anything and they were right. They also told us that bleeding is common in IVF pregnancies and that I could bleed again. They told me not to stress and when it happens to lay down and put my feet up. It happened again at 5w5d. I was seen again at 5w6d. This is when the doctor confirmed there were TWO gestational sacks! Twins! 

She was also able to find the sub-chronic hematoma which was the bleeding area. She said it was fairly small compared to those she's seen before and she was not worried about it at all. She also said there was a good chance I would bleed through my whole pregnancy but it would not affect the babies. We left there feeling really relieved and so happy that it was confirmed that we were having twins! We started telling pretty much everyone, "we're having twins!" We started to really wrap our heads around what that meant for us.. Double diapers, double feedings, double EVERYTHING! We're gonna need a bigger house, bigger cars, two babies?! What!? We started talking twin names, looking at twin products. We got to see our twins and their tiny little heartbeat flickers @ 6w5d:

Baby B on the left was right on track, measuring at 6w5d. Baby A was a little behind measuring at 6w1d. The doctors weren't worried at this point and said as long as they are measuring plus or minus 5 days it is nothing to worry about. Today we went in for our 7w5d ultrasound. This is when we got the news that Baby A hasn't grown much in the past week and they didn't see a heartbeat. Baby A measured at 6w2d while Baby B measured at 7w2d. The doctor informed us that this is common in twin pregnancies and it is likely that Baby A will either miscarry or absorb into the uterus. Yes we we're sad. The loss of one of the lives inside me is not something you just shrug off. But at the same time we have SO much to be happy about! We got to hear Baby B's heartbeat and it was the most amazing sound I've ever heard. Here's he is in all his glory; our alpha fetus:

We mourned the loss of Baby A for however we knew this was a possibility and we are just as happy to have one healthy baby as we would have been to have two. We also graduated from the fertility clinic today. Que another onset of emotions. What a journey this has been! To be leaving the comfort of this clinic we know so well; the doctors and nurses and even the receptionists we have grown to love and trust; to be discharged out into the world as a regular ol' pregnant couple. We have accomplished what we set foot in there to accomplish and now it's time for my body and nature to run its course. We are so grateful for this experience and all the wonderful people it has lead us to. All the trials and tribulations, every monumental step in the right direction; it was all worth it for this outcome. We are pregnant with a child that is equally me and equally him. We will raise it together in love and unity; teach it right from wrong and love it unconditionally. 

Next week we go to Kaiser for our first OB appointment. A new set of doctors, a new facility, new rules and protocol. We are beyond excited for the continuation of this journey. Thank you to every single one of you who have tuned in to read the updates, supported us through kind words or prayers, and held my hand as I cried and rejoiced through this journey. 

This is truly a Christmas Miracle we will never forget.

The In Vitro Journey - Round 1 - Transfer and 2ww!

Readers, I am so sorry to keep you waiting on this post. By now everyone who reads this probably already knows we had our transfer but I thought I owed to you all to sit down and right out a detailed description of bringing our embryos home and what has gone on since then.

Here they are in all their glory! 

2 perfect embryos after they had been thawed out 

(one was 5 days old before it was frozen and one was 6 days old). 

On Tuesday we arrived at the clinic at 11:30am to check in for our 12:00pm transfer. Due to my clinic's over booking, we sat in the waiting room until 1:00pm. This was probably the most torturous hour of my life. We were annoyed but we were confident our embryos were in good hands and were thawing out and getting ready for us. Finally around 1:30pm we saw our doctor who apologized for the wait and promised us the transfer itself would be quick and easy and we'd be out of there in now time. 

We met with the embryologist who gave us the above picture of our embryos and also let us know that one of our embryos was lost during the thaw. Though we were saddened by this, we knew it was a possibility and it made us even more thankful that we did another round of IVF before attempting to transfer the one frozen embie from our first batch.

The doctor came in and inserted a ultrasound so they could see my lining and know exactly where to place the embryos. The doctor then inserted a catheter which we could see on the ultrasound. We watched on a TV screen as the embryologist in the lab sucked the two embryos up into a tiny catheter and then walked them to our room. The doctor then inserted the small catheter into the catheter that was inside of me. You can see on the ultrasound the exact spot in my lining where the embryos were placed (the little white dot).

After the transfer was complete we were told to take it easy for a little while but ultimately to return to live as normal. No bed rest, no baths, and no heavy lifting. I have been taking part in all the IVF "old wives' tales" such as eating one piece of pineapple core a day, one 8 oz glass of pomegranate juice and 5 Brazil nuts. I've also been eating healthy and drinking lots of water and most importantly staying positive. It's hard not to over analyze every little cramp and movement you feel in your body and I've turned to Dr. Google more times than once.

1dp5&6dt

(1 day past 5 & 6 day transfer)

I kind of laid around the house a lot this day. I didn't feel much of anything all day.

2dp5&6dt

Back to work! Felt little tiny pulls and twinges in my lower abdomen but nothing to think twice about.

3dp5&6dt

Felt some cramping and sore lower back on and off all day.

4dp5&6dt

Today I woke up feeling crampy and sore. The cramps have been pretty steady all day which I want to think is a good thing but at times I worry it's the beginning of my period. What a cruel joke of the world that pregnancy symptoms so closely mimic period symptoms! I bought @ home pregnancy tests today but my other half is making me hold off until at least 6dp.

The 2ww (2 week wait) continues!

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The In Vitro Journey - One Week Countdown!

Ooops, this was supposed to get posted yesterday but life has been a crazy whirlwind, forgive me. Just wanted to give you all a quick update as we count down the final 7 days of having never been pregnant. Our last appointment was yesterday (Tuesday) to make sure my uterine lining is thickening as it should be. The doctor's want it to be at least 8mm with a nice "triple stripe" lining. I passed!

So now the protocol changes to prepare my body during this crucial final week. My estrogen patches have been increased from 2 patches for 3 days to 4 patches. I also start oral Prometrium which is another hormone that when coupled with Estrogen patches mimics your body's natural cycle. On top of that I also will be starting twice daily Endometrin inserts. This insert contains 100 mg of micronized progesterone. Progesterone is a natural hormone that helps the uterine lining receive and nourish a fertilized egg. My other half and I will both have to take antibiotics for 3 days prior to transfer to insure that there are no bacterial infections that could compromise the process.

Anyways, enough with all the drugs and protocol talk. We are so excited to have come this far in this journey and to be this close to our ultimate goal. In a little over 3 weeks from now we will know the results on our first round of IVF. We will know if we will be adding a member to our little family or if we will be delayed again. We will either forget about every needle, every pill it's taken to get here or we will fail, and grieve, and be forced to pick up the pieces and start again. Either way, I feel so accomplished to have gotten this far and I personally am so thankful for the support from all sides. I hope to bring you good news in the near future! Until then...

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The In Vitro Journey - Frozen Embryo Transfer Plan

Hello dear readers! Sorry to keep you waiting for a so long in between posts. I've been a bit caught up in all our "down time" and we have been enjoying some shot-and-appointment-free weeks. David and I decided to take a quick weekend trip to Las Vegas to celebrate our creation of life! We have 6 embryos waiting for us in the freezer; how amazing! Our celebration included a lot of relaxing in our hotel room @ The Rio, champagne and the BEST chocolate covered strawberries delivered to our room thanks to my awesome parents, and lots of delicious meals. We had good luck in the casinos, came home with about $400 more cash than we started with which means the trip pretty much payed for itself! I had to stop by my girl Britney's machine and of course she helped me make a little bit of money.

We took a ride in The High Roller, the world's highest observation tower. It's like a really big ferris wheel with these big capsules that hold about 20 people. It's a 30 minute ride and at the highest point you are up at 550 ft'. 

Anyways, we had a lot of fun and the trip was just what we needed to take our minds off our IVF journey for a little bit.

When we got back we met with our doctor to review the plan for our upcoming Frozen Embryo Transfer. I started birth control at the start of my next cycle which caused my ovaries to stop any egg production. A few weeks later we were back on the injections. 20cc of Luprolide once daily. This drug ultimately shuts down my body's reproductive system. If my body was to naturally ovulate on it's own it would throw off the timing of my uterine receptivity making implantation of the frozen embryo less likely. After 10 days of Lupron I added in estrogen patches! These are fun... 2 little super sticky patches that I put on my stomach for 3 days at a time. These help increase the thickness of my endometrial lining. One week before our transfer, I will stop the Lupron injections and start Progesterone inserts 3x a day. This hormone helps prepare a receptive lining for the embryo to implant into. It also helps to prevent the body from fighting off the embryo. All these drugs ultimately mimic a natural cycle of pregnancy. Ours just so happens to be controlled by professionals (Science is so amazing!). Our transfer is scheduled for November 17th. At that point we will have 2 healthy, perfect little embryos implanted directly into my uterus. And then we wait. And wait and wait and wait. 

There's the facts, the plan, the details. I try not to let the emotions shine through these posts but trust me, there are a lot of them from all sides of this puzzle. There are also side effects to the drugs. Constant headaches, earaches, cramps, fatigues, and boy am I sick of needles in my tummy every night. But ultimately, I know that none of this will matter when we feel the very first kick of the life growing inside my womb.

I think I covered everything.. Hopefully I don't have any updates for you until transfer day! Send us all your happy thoughts and prayers if that's your thing ;)

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Book Review: Grave Mercy (His Fair Assassin, #1) by Robin LaFevers

Grave Mercy by Robin LaFevers
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Avg rating: 3.94
Genre: Fantasy, Historical Fiction, Young Adult

Goodreads Summary:
Why be the sheep, when you can be the wolf?

Seventeen-year-old Ismae escapes from the brutality of an arranged marriage into the sanctuary of the convent of St. Mortain, where the sisters still serve the gods of old. Here she learns that the god of Death Himself has blessed her with dangerous gifts—and a violent destiny. If she chooses to stay at the convent, she will be trained as an assassin and serve as a handmaiden to Death. To claim her new life, she must destroy the lives of others.

Ismae’s most important assignment takes her straight into the high court of Brittany—where she finds herself woefully under prepared—not only for the deadly games of intrigue and treason, but for the impossible choices she must make. For how can she deliver Death’s vengeance upon a target who, against her will, has stolen her heart?

My Actual Rating: 4.8

"Perhaps that is because you mistake death for justice, and they are not the same thing at all."

This book was really good! It's sat on my TBR shelf forever and I wish I had read it sooner. It slightly reminded me of The Throne of Glass series and Ismae kind of resembles Celaena Sardotian (except not as cool).

The world building was very creative and had clever ties to real world history.. I found it all quite interesting and the whole serving of Saint Mortain aka the god of death was a great touch. I'm interested to know if Ismae will continue to serve Saint Mortain even if she leaves the convent.

I did find the pace to be a bit slow and there is a whole bunch of politics which bored me for a little while there but the way it builds and comes together was magnificent. The character development was impressive and believable and everything happened at just the right pace. There were times when I couldn't care less about the "drama" going on in the royal kingdom and only cared about the budding relationship between Ismae & Duval, but nonetheless things started to get more exciting near the end and I couldn't put it down.

I will definitely be reading on in the series as I hear the second book is even better than the first!


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Book Review: Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Avg rating: 4.31
Genre: Sci-Fi, Fiction, Dystopia

Goodreads Summary:
It's the year 2044, and the real world is an ugly place.

Like most of humanity, Wade Watts escapes his grim surroundings by spending his waking hours jacked into the OASIS, a sprawling virtual utopia that lets you be anything you want to be, a place where you can live and play and fall in love on any of ten thousand planets. 

And like most of humanity, Wade dreams of being the one to discover the ultimate lottery ticket that lies concealed within this virtual world. For somewhere inside this giant networked playground, OASIS creator James Halliday has hidden a series of fiendish puzzles that will yield massive fortune — and remarkable power — to whoever can unlock them. 

For years, millions have struggled fruitlessly to attain this prize, knowing only that Halliday's riddles are based in the pop culture he loved — that of the late twentieth century. And for years, millions have found in this quest another means of escape, retreating into happy, obsessive study of Halliday's icons. Like many of his contemporaries, Wade is as comfortable debating the finer points of John Hughes's oeuvre, playing Pac-Man, or reciting Devo lyrics as he is scrounging power to run his OASIS rig. 

And then Wade stumbles upon the first puzzle. 

Suddenly the whole world is watching, and thousands of competitors join the hunt — among them certain powerful players who are willing to commit very real murder to beat Wade to this prize. Now the only way for Wade to survive and preserve everything he knows is to win. But to do so, he may have to leave behind his oh-so-perfect virtual existence and face up to life — and love — in the real world he's always been so desperate to escape. 

A world at stake. 
A quest for the ultimate prize. 
Are you ready?

My Actual Rating: 4.8

I am not a gamer by any means but this book was really really good and the author is really impressed me! The book takes place in the future but not too far into the future and it's actually pretty realistic of what could be our future. The virtual reality is so crazy to even think about; kids learn to walk, talk, read and lots of other things in this virtual reality. They are basically raising themselves.

At first this book was hard to wrap my head around because I had a hard time remembering what was real life and what was part of this virtual reality. Even then, it all pieced together in the most interesting way.

The characters were great! They weren't these perfect, make believe people. They were realistic people who got to live out their idea of their perfect self in their virtual reality. The romance aspect was SO adorable.. It was a very small part of the book which usually I don't like but for this book it was perfect. I loved the ending, loved the drama, loved everything about this book!

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Book Review: Invaded (Alienated, #2) by Melissa Sanders

Invaded by Melissa Landers
My rating: 2 of 5 stars
Avg rating: 4.05
Genre: Young Adult, Sci-Fi, Romance

Goodreads Summary:
The romantic sequel to Alienated takes long-distance relationships to a new level as Cara and Aelyx long for each other from opposite ends of the universe...until a threat to both their worlds reunites them. 

Cara always knew life on planet L’eihr would be an adjustment. With Aelyx, her L’eihr boyfriend, back on Earth, working to mend the broken alliance between their two planets, Cara is left to fend for herself at a new school, surrounded by hostile alien clones. Even the weird dorm pet hates her.

Things look up when Cara is appointed as human representative to a panel preparing for a human colony on L’eihr. A society melding their two cultures is a place where Cara and Aelyx could one day make a life together. But with L’eihr leaders balking at granting even the most basic freedoms, Cara begins to wonder if she could ever be happy on this planet, even with Aelyx by her side.

Meanwhile, on Earth, Aelyx, finds himself thrown into a full-scale PR campaign to improve human-L’eihr relations. Humans don’t know that their very survival depends on this alliance: only Aelyx’s people have the technology to fix the deadly contamination in the global water supply that human governments are hiding. Yet despite their upper hand, the leaders of his world suddenly seem desperate to get humans on their side, and hardly bat an eye at extremists’ multiple attempts on Aelyx’s life.

The Way clearly needs humans’ help . . . but with what? And what will they ask for in return?

My Actual Rating: 2.5

Ugh.. I don't know why I decided to read on in this series.. This book was not good. It started slow, continued to be slow throughout and then ended in a hurried rush.

When I finally decided I liked one of the characters they died.... Typical.

I felt like Cara was all over the place. She makes super rash decisions that permanently effected her whole life. I could hardly keep up with her; sometimes she hated L'heir and then all of a sudden she was a politician, then she wanted to go back to living on Earth and then all of a sudden she gets a high up spot on the council and is headed back to L'heir.

The relationship was boring.. There was a small hitch in it that was stupid and, I thought, thrown in there just to make the book last longer. I won't be reading on.

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Book Review: Jane Eyre by Charolette Brontë

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Avg rating: 4.08
Genre: Classic, Fiction, Romance

Goodreads Summary:
Orphaned into the household of her Aunt Reed at Gateshead, subject to the cruel regime at Lowood charity school, Jane Eyre nonetheless emerges unbroken in spirit and integrity. She takes up the post of governess at Thornfield, falls in love with Mr. Rochester, and discovers the impediment to their lawful marriage in a story that transcends melodrama to portray a woman's passionate search for a wider and richer life than Victorian society traditionally allowed.

With a heroine full of yearning, the dangerous secrets she encounters, and the choices she finally makes, Charlotte Bronte's innovative and enduring romantic novel continues to engage and provoke readers.

My Actual Rating: 3.8

Finally, finally, finally I have finished this book! It felt like it took me ages.

This was probably my favorite classic.. I was actually able to follow along and understand what was happening for about 90% of the time. At first the perspective was hard to follow but I got the hang of it and began to enjoy it. The beginning was my favorite, when Jane was a child and treated poorly and shipped away to the orphan school. The romance was right up my ally in the sense that it was forbidden for quite sometime even though everyone knew it was building when it shouldn't have been. Finally, FINALLY when Mr. Rodchester and Miss Eyre admitted their feelings for each other is was almost too late. There were so many other people's emotions tied up in limbo. Then when Miss Eyre decided to leave and go on that poorly planned journey and almost die, I almost died right along with her. For one I was bored out of my mind and for two it was so clear that she did not belong with that other guy (can't even remember his name because he was so irrelevant.) I felt like it was major space filler and made the book unnecessarily long and drawn out.

The reunion was not all I wished it was but I was happy with the outcome. I'm glad to have read this classic tale and put it behind me.

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Book Review: Perfect Chemistry (Perfect Chemistry, #1) by Simone Elkeles

Perfect Chemistry by Simone Elkeles
My rating: 1 of 5 stars
Avg rating: 4.09
Genre: Romance, Young Adult, Contemporary

Goodreads Summary:
A fresh, urban twist on the classic tale of star-crossed lovers.

When Brittany Ellis walks into chemistry class on the first day of senior year, she has no clue that her carefully created 'perfect' life is about to unravel before her eyes. She's forced to be lab partners with Alex Fuentes, a gang member from the other side of town, and he is about to threaten everything she's worked so hard for: her flawless reputation, her relationship with her boyfriend, and the secret that her home life is anything but perfect. 

Alex is a bad boy and he knows it. So when he makes a bet with his friends to lure Brittany into his life, he thinks nothing of it. But soon Alex realizes Brittany is a real person with real problems, and suddenly the bet he made in arrogance turns into something much more.

In a passionate story about looking beneath the surface, Simone Elkeles breaks through the stereotypes and barriers that threaten to keep Brittany and Alex apart.

My Actual Rating: 1.2

That was one of the worst books I've read in a really long time. I actually feel like I lost brain cells from reading it. The characters were SO stereotypical it was borderline racism.

The romance aspect was so far from believable I can't even explain it. One minute they hated each other and every thing about the other person and then all of a sudden "is it possible to be addicted to a person?" "she's the girl of my dreams." I wanted to throw up.

The author tried so hard to make the characters seem like they developed during the book but they didn't. At all. They were so one dimensional and flat! They made me want to pound on the keyboard AFKLSDH:FKLSDFJSDLKF

Anyways boy am I glad that is over.. I will never read anything by this author again.

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